Raising a Deaf Child: Dr. Anne McIntosh on Resilience, Advocacy, Accessibility, and Trusting Your Gut

What does it take to raise a confident, successful deaf child?

When parents first learn their child is deaf or hard of hearing, they often find themselves navigating a world filled with new information, difficult decisions, and endless questions. How do you advocate for your child? What educational setting is best? How do you foster independence while ensuring they have the support they need?

In a recent podcast episode, I had the privilege of speaking with Dr. Anne McIntosh, a communication scientist, professor, author, accessibility advocate, and founder of Safe'N'Clear, the company behind the world's first FDA-approved transparent surgical face mask.

Our conversation explored everything from growing up deaf in a mainstream school setting to self-advocacy, resilience, communication access, and the importance of trusting your instincts as a parent. Whether you're raising a deaf child, supporting a deaf or hard of hearing student, or simply interested in accessibility and inclusion, Dr. McIntosh's story offers valuable lessons and hope.

Growing Up Deaf in a Mainstream School Setting

Dr. McIntosh was not identified as deaf until kindergarten. Although she had severe-to-profound hearing loss, her parents were initially told she was a healthy, typically developing child. It wasn't until a perceptive kindergarten teacher noticed Anne was constantly watching and copying her classmates rather than naturally keeping pace with them that her hearing loss was discovered.

Following her diagnosis, Anne received a hearing aid, speech therapy, and language support. By the time she entered public school, she had caught up with her peers academically and linguistically.

Growing up in North Carolina, she attended mainstream public schools and was often the only deaf or hard of hearing student in the building. She spent years sitting in the front row, learning how to maximize visual information, advocate for her needs, and develop strategies that helped her succeed.

One of those strategies was learning the International Phonetic Alphabet (IPA) at a young age to help with pronunciation and language development.

"I learned to read very, very early," she shared. "As long as I could get it in the textbook or on the board, I could learn it."

Her experience highlights an important truth for many deaf and hard of hearing children: when communication is accessible, learning becomes possible.

Why High Expectations Matter for Deaf and Hard of Hearing Children

One of the most powerful themes from our conversation was the importance of maintaining high expectations.

Too often, families are given discouraging predictions after a child's diagnosis. While it's important to understand potential challenges, it is equally important not to allow those challenges to define a child's future.

Dr. McIntosh credits much of her success to the expectations her parents had for her.

They expected her to participate in family life.

They expected her to work hard in school.

They expected her to pursue her goals.

Most importantly, they never lowered their expectations simply because she was deaf.

"Children are smart enough to pick up on what you expect from them," she explained. "If you have low expectations, they'll meet those expectations. If you have high expectations, they'll work toward those expectations too."

As a parent of a deaf teenager myself, this message deeply resonated. My husband and I have always focused on our son's abilities rather than his limitations. We've encouraged him to dream big, pursue opportunities, and understand that deafness is not something that prevents him from achieving his goals.

Today, as he prepares for college, those expectations have become his own.

How Parent Advocacy Shapes Future Self-Advocacy

One of the most inspiring parts of Dr. McIntosh's story was learning about her mother.

Before each school year, her mother would meet with school administrators and teachers to discuss which classroom environment would best support Anne's success. She understood her daughter's strengths, challenges, and communication needs better than anyone.

In many ways, she became Anne's first advocate.

Over time, Anne learned to advocate for herself.

When she entered college, she introduced herself to professors, explained her hearing loss, attended office hours, and sought support when she needed it.

This progression, from parent advocacy to self-advocacy, is something many families hope for.

Children learn to advocate for themselves by first watching trusted adults advocate for them.

Every IEP meeting, classroom conversation, accommodation request, and difficult question teaches valuable self-advocacy skills that can last a lifetime.

The Hidden Strength of Deafness: Resilience and Problem-Solving Skills

One of my favorite moments from our conversation was hearing Dr. McIntosh describe what she considers the greatest gift of deafness.

Problem-solving.

Growing up deaf in a hearing world often requires constant adaptation. Communication barriers arise. Information is missed. Unexpected challenges occur.

As a result, many deaf and hard of hearing individuals develop extraordinary resilience.

"The minute the normal route doesn't work, you adapt and pivot," she explained.

Instead of seeing obstacles as roadblocks, they learn to find alternate paths forward.

As she spoke, I couldn't help but think about my own family. My older son is deaf, and his ability to problem-solve is remarkable. When faced with a challenge, his instinct is rarely to give up. Instead, he immediately begins asking, "What do I need to do next?"

That resilience is something I see in many deaf and hard of hearing children.

It's a skill that serves them far beyond the classroom.

Communication Access and Accessibility in Education

Although technology has transformed accessibility for deaf and hard of hearing students, Dr. McIntosh emphasized that communication access is about much more than devices.

Throughout her education, she relied heavily on visual supports, reading, classroom positioning, and strong relationships with educators.

Today, students have access to captioning, speech-to-text technology, note-taking services, hearing technology, and a wide range of accommodations that simply didn't exist when she was growing up.

While these advances are remarkable, she reminds us that accessibility is most effective when it is personalized to the individual student.

Every deaf child is different.

What works beautifully for one student may not be the best fit for another.

Why Every Deaf Child Needs a Backup Plan Beyond Technology

One of the most practical pieces of advice Dr. McIntosh shared was surprisingly simple:

Always have a backup plan.

Technology is incredible, but batteries die. Internet connections fail. Devices malfunction.

As a college professor, she recalled a day when the internet went down on campus. Her students immediately assumed class would be canceled.

Dr. McIntosh, however, grew up in a world without internet access, PowerPoint presentations, or AI-powered note-taking tools.

"We can still have class," she told them.

For deaf and hard of hearing students, backup plans might include sign language, written communication, extra batteries, alternative note-taking methods, or other accommodations that remain available when technology fails.

Accessibility should never depend on a single solution.

How a Communication Barrier in Healthcare Led to Innovation

Perhaps the most powerful story Dr. McIntosh shared was the experience that led her to create the world's first FDA-approved transparent surgical face mask.

After enduring 25 hours of labor with her first child, she was suddenly rushed into surgery for an emergency C-section.

In the operating room, everyone around her wore traditional masks.

As someone who relies heavily on lip reading, she instantly lost access to one of her primary communication tools.

She could hear voices, but she couldn't understand what was being said.

She couldn't easily ask questions.

She couldn't fully participate in conversations about her own healthcare.

For someone who had spent her entire life finding solutions to communication challenges, it was an overwhelming and frightening experience.

After her daughter was safely born, she couldn't stop thinking about what had happened.

What if healthcare providers could simply wear transparent masks?

That question eventually became Safe'N'Clear.

What began as a communication barrier in healthcare became an innovation that has improved communication access for countless patients, families, educators, and professionals.

Transparent Face Masks and Accessibility in Healthcare

One of the most important lessons from Dr. McIntosh's work is that accessibility benefits everyone.

Transparent masks were originally designed to improve communication access for deaf and hard of hearing individuals, but they also help children, older adults, second-language learners, and anyone who relies on visual cues during conversations.

Facial expressions are a critical part of communication.

When we can see someone's face, we understand more.

We feel more connected.

We feel safer.

This is especially important in healthcare settings, where misunderstandings can affect treatment, decision-making, and patient outcomes.

Communication access is not a luxury.

It is an essential component of quality care.

What Parents Raising Deaf and Hard of Hearing Children Can Learn from Dr. Anne McIntosh

One of the most encouraging aspects of Dr. McIntosh's story is that it challenges many of the misconceptions that still exist about deafness today.

Deaf and hard of hearing children are capable of thriving academically, socially, professionally, and personally.

Success is not determined by a diagnosis.

It is shaped by communication access, strong support systems, opportunities for growth, and belief in a child's potential.

Whether your child attends a mainstream school, a school for the deaf, or a combination of educational settings, the goal is the same: helping them become confident, capable, and self-determined.

Trust Your Gut: Advice for Parents Raising Deaf Children

As our conversation came to a close, Dr. McIntosh offered one final piece of advice that every parent needs to hear:

Trust your gut.

When Anne was growing up, her parents were given predictions about what she might never do.

They were told she might not learn to read.

They were told she might not learn to speak.

Yet those predictions didn't match what they were seeing in their daughter every day.

So they trusted their instincts.

They trusted their observations.

They trusted their child.

And they chose to believe in her potential.

As parents, we should absolutely seek expert guidance and gather information. But we should also remember that no one knows our children the way we do.

If something doesn't feel right, ask more questions.

Seek another opinion.

Gather more information.

Listen to the professionals but don't ignore your intuition.

Sometimes your instincts are pointing you toward exactly what your child needs.

Final Thoughts

Dr. Anne McIntosh's journey from a young girl with severe-to-profound hearing loss to a professor, entrepreneur, researcher, author, and accessibility advocate is a powerful reminder of what is possible when children are given support, opportunity, and belief.

For parents raising deaf and hard of hearing children, her message is clear:

·      Maintain high expectations.

·      Teach self-advocacy.

·      Encourage problem-solving.

·      Create communication access.

·      And above all, trust your gut.

Your child's future is not defined by a diagnosis. It is shaped by the opportunities, support, and confidence they receive along the way.

About Dr. Anne McIntosh

Dr. Anne McIntosh is a communication scientist, professor, author, and founder/CEO of Safe'N'Clear, the company behind the world's first FDA-approved transparent surgical face mask. With degrees from UNC Chapel Hill, the University of Montana, and the University of Texas at Austin, her work blends communication, accessibility, innovation, and advocacy.

Passionate about inclusion for deaf and hard of hearing communities, Dr. McIntosh works to improve communication access in healthcare, education, and everyday life. She is also an educator, researcher, consultant, and children's book author whose work helps families and professionals rethink what true accessibility looks like.

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